To Bae, or NOT to Bae?

February 14th: 

Know what day that is? Bae Day.


And if you're already boo'ed up, 'tis the season to post those perfectly-curated look-at-my-love pics across all your social media platforms. Oh, come on! Don't act like you don't which pictures I'm talking about: the ones of those flowers on your desk at work that Bae sent. Or the picture of those heart-shaped chocolates you're about to inhale Cookie-monster style as soon as you snap a post-worthy shot of them. Or maybe for you, it's that staple white-teddy-bear-holding-a-red-heart-from-Hallmark. Congrats to all you love-birds — let the caking commence.

But if you happen to be caught in that awkward in-between-dating phase, soon and very soon, you're going to have to make a decision to either pursue/continue that relationship, or 'Let It Go', Frozen-style. It might just be time to finally answer that one, big, pending question: To Bae, or Not to Bae? But how do you decide if they're worth changing your Facebook status to "In a Relationship"? What qualities and characteristics should you be looking for? Read on, my friend.

  • They are forgiving.
Yoooo I didn't wanna be the one to tell you this but er're not perfect. None of us are. We're gonna need some forgiveness vouchers in the bank. And generally, a person who is forgiving is also understanding and full of grace.
  • They make you happy, Pharell-style.
Smiling [with them] is your favorite.
  • They are considerate. Heck, thoughtful even!
Does Future Hopeful Wannabe Bae leave "just thinking boutcha" Post-its on your work desk? Did they greet you with an iced tall caramel macchiato with extra caramel and whipped cream [this may or may not be my actual, regular Starbucks order] this morning 'cause they knew you woke up on the wrong side of the bed? (**actually, more like no side. You weren't even on the bed. It was that bad...**) Did they offer to pick up your kid brother from his basketball game tonight because they were actually listening when you said today would be a super crazy/stressful day for you? If you answered 'oh yeah' to any of these questions, he/she just might be a keeper...
  • You can see yourself sharing a bathroom with them in the future.
- This is actually important. Does Future Potential Possible Bae share the same um...hygiene routines you do? If you have OCD, consider the fact that they're sloppy as can be. When you went to their place for dinner, were last month's dishes still in the sink? Just sayin'.
  • They're nice.
- Sounds basic, right? WRONG! I'm not talking about being nice to you (or maybe I am - if I am, that's a whole 'nother post for a whole 'nother day). Pay attention the way they treat other people. Don't ignore red flags like if he/she cusses out the local grocery store cashier, is disrespectful to parents/relatives or if you catch them in lies they've told other people.
  • They're easy on the eyes.
- #HeySailor! Come onnnn. Don't act like you don't want a lil Looker. Seriously, I hate when people are like "it's what's on the inside that counts." That is SO true, but God gives us vision and sight for a reason, so I hope Future Bae will assist your viewing pleasure. That said, everybody has their own taste you.
  • They are in a relationship.
Wait...what? Why do I even have to write this.
  • They don't return your texts/calls within 48 hours.
- So it's 2017 and we have so many ways to reach people. Phone, email, text, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat...and they still couldn't find a way to contact you (?). **Kanye shrug**
  • Their word means nothing.
- Yowserz. Enough said. 
  • ​They are selfish.
- What's yours is definitely not theirs. Big Bird and the Sesame Street gang were right: sharing is caring.​ Little things become big things, so not-sharing-food can turn in to not sharing a car, home or hopes, dreams, etc. in the future.
  • They are uncertain.
- When ya know, ya know. Confusion is a red flag.
  • They've actually verbalized that they're not ready for a relationship.
- Hey Oprah, give it a rest. Don't try to "Doctor Phil" them into a relationship if they're telling you that's not what they want. You're wasting your time, and if no one's ever told you this, you deserve better. Got it?
Ok. Get out of here. Don't get all mushy on me now - you've got a decision to make.
Happy caking. :)

5 thoughts on “To Bae, or NOT to Bae?”

  1. I love your writing style and relatable approach. Perfect topic and timing with great advice. Not to Bae: if they’re in a relationship!! LOL, yea cuz some people about that ratchet life! Smh So proud of you cuz ….Write on!

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